A Christmas Party to Remember
by WordsLikeStardust
Summary: Total Christmas Themed Crack fic dedicated to the girls at the WWE Revolution Forum! Merry Christmas Ladies!


**Christmas Party to Remember**

**Author's Note: **Dedicated to all the girls at the WWE Revolution E-Fed forum. I love all you girls so much. Merry Christmas to all of you! Or Happy Hanukah or Kwanza if that's what you celebrate! I tried to pair you all with your favorite superstar, or at least one in your top five list.

The couples are as follows:

Yuri and Jeff Hardy

Ellie and Mike Mizanin

Ingrid and Matt Hardy

Christal and Chris Jericho

Chantel and CM Punk

Kylie and Cody Rhodes

Katie and Randy Orton

Maddie and Dave Batista

Victoria and John Morrison

Kelsie and Wade Barrett

Reese and Christian Cage

Lillian and Zack Ryder

Amy and Chris Masters

Callie and Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson

Alia and John Cena

And you guys are probably wondering who I paired myself with since I gave Dave to Maddie and Randy to Katie lol. I finally settled on Edge because he looks so good with short hair and in my newfound love for him, I figured why the hell not. So enjoy!

* * *

The Karaoke machine was a hit. Or at least it would be a hit if Chris Jericho gave someone else in the room a chance to sing. Right now, he was giving an impromptu concert right in the middle of her living room.

Kasey wasn't sure whether to be thrilled or horrified. She shot a wry glance to Chris's girlfriend and her good friend Christal. "Your boyfriend isn't even drunk yet and he won't stop singing."

"So what?" Christal replied with a dreamy smile on her face, the effect of love and the amount of wine she had already consumed. "He looks so good doing it!"

"She's like totally trashed, yo!" Zack Ryder appeared from behind Kasey. "Great party Kasey."

"Glad you're enjoying it, Zack." Kasey turned away from an inebriated Christal to address him. "Where's Lillian?" She asked, referring to his girlfriend.

"Getting some more wine so she can party like a Broski!" Zack informed her with a goofy grin. "Woo woo woo you know it!"

"And…I don't think Christal's the only one who's got too much alcohol in her system right now." Kasey chuckled, shaking her head in amusement.

"I'm going to beat Chris with these really expensive shoes I'm wearing if he doesn't give someone else a turn at Karaoke!" Amy complained from her seat on the couch.

"Babe!" Amy's boyfriend Chris Masters hushed her. "Relax, I'm sure he'll give someone else a turn. It's a party, just have fun."

"Then I'm going to need another drink!" Amy declared, getting to her feet.

"He can sing all he wants to!" Christal argued. "My man is all kinds of fine when he's performing!"

"How many drunk people are there?" Chantel asked coming out of the kitchen. "It looks like Amy and Christal have gotten a good head start."

"Zack too." Kasey told her. "Your man is the only one I'm sure isn't drunk and that's only because I know he doesn't drink. Where is Punk anyway?"

"Plotting to steal the Karaoke microphone from Jericho, where else?" Chantel shrugged. "I'm all for a little Fozzy here and there, but this is getting ridiculous."

"I'll say!" Kylie agreed, coming up to slip her arm through Kasey's. "I'd rather listen to Cena battle rap over this right now."

"Hey!" John Cena looked offended at her comment. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"That you absolutely suck, Cena!" Dwayne Johnson informed him.

"Don't you two dare start fighting right now!" Callie warned, hopping onto Dwayne's lap to keep him from getting up. "It's Christmas! Have a drink and tell me how gorgeous I am!"

"You are gorgeous, Baby!" Dwayne assured her. "And I'd rather look at you than Cena's ugly mug anyway."

"You'd think they'd have moved on after Wrestlemania." Kasey rolled her eyes.

"Not likely." Kylie shook her head. "But at least Callie's got Dwayne under control."

"Whipped." Kasey agreed. "Where's Alia to distract John anyway?"

"Um?" Kylie pointed toward John and had Kasey looking over and blanching. "She's got you covered."

"She's got John covered." Kasey looked away. "Why do they have to make out like horny teenagers all the time?!"

"Feel the lust!" Chantel joked.

"I don't want to feel anything." Kasey whined. "I've only had one drink so far and it's my freaking party!"

"We can fix that." Kylie chuckled. "Come on, let's get you a drink!"

Kasey allowed Kylie to lead her into her kitchen, where both women paused at the sight of the crowd that had gathered around the kitchen table. "You've got to be kidding me?"

"It's Randy and Dave. You should have expected as much." Kylie rolled her eyes.

"God damn it, they better not get sick on my floors!"

"Shots! Shots! Shots! Shots!" The crowd around the two former Evolution teammates cheered as Randy and Dave tried to out do each other in a shot drinking contest.

"Katie?" Kasey looked to one of her best friends who also happened to be Randy's girlfriend. "You couldn't have talked him out of this?"

"You know how competitive he and Dave get." Katie shrugged, sipping on her own drink. "It's his head tomorrow morning."

"Cody?" Kylie grabbed the arm of her boyfriend. "Why didn't you distract Randy into some other kind of contest? You know how he gets when he drinks!"

"I stopped covering Randy's ass when Legacy disbanded." Cody snorted. "He's Katie's problem now!"

"Dave shame on you!" The animal's fiance and long time girlfriend Maddie scolded. "Kasey is going to kill you and so will I for the matter!"

"Randy started it!"

"Hey don't you throw me under the bus!"

"Am I lying?"

"…"

"That's what I thought."

"RANDY!" Katie glared at him. "You told me this was Dave's idea!"

"…"

"You are so not getting any tonight!"

"Dave! I fucking hate you so much right now!"

"Wow." Kasey shook her head in amazement. "Just wow."

SMASH!

Everyone froze at the sound of something crashing to the floor back in the living room and silence followed as everyone looked around guiltily.

Kasey's face paled at the sound. "Please tell me-"

"YOU ASSCLOWN!" Jericho's angry shout was slightly muffled from the other room.

"TAP BITCH!" CM Punk's voice answered him. "TAP TO THE ANACONDA VICE!"

"Oh-my-God." Kasey covered her face with her hands. "I don't even want to know."

"Get him, Baby!" Chantel cheered. "Don't release him until he taps and refuses to sing anymore Karaoke!"

"You heard my woman." Punk continued. "No more Karaoke and admit I'm the BEST IN THE WORLD!"

"Would you like to me go break it up?" John Morrison offered from where he stood leaning against the counter, his arm around Victoria.

"JoMo, you're a Sweetheart really, but-"

"I think Randy and Dave should go break it up." Maddie suggested with a glare directed pointedly at her fiance. "And they can try and fix whatever they broke."

"I think that's a great idea, Maddie." Katie shared a wicked grin with the other woman. "Go on Randy, go help break up the fight."

Both Dave and Randy shared mutual looks of resignation before trudging in the direction of the living room.

"If you two don't cut the crap, someone's getting an RKO!"

"This was a bad idea." Kasey muttered, shaking her head. "What was I thinking, trying to host a Christmas party in my house with all these volatile egos floating around?"

"Technically," Cody pointed out, now standing with his arm around Kylie. "This wasn't your idea, you got coerced into agreeing with it."

"That's right! Rhodes, you're genius." Kasey told him before pivoting towards the kitchen table again. "This is all YOUR fault, Christian!"

"What?" Captain Charisma pulled his girlfriend Reese quickly onto his lap to use as a shield. "No! No! Rhodes, what the fuck? I was not alone in this! I suggested it, but plenty of other people agreed with my idea! I didn't even say the party had to be here!"

Wade Barrett shifted to put his wife Kelsie in front of him, taking a page out of Christian's book. "That part was actually my idea."

Kasey glared at the British superstar balefully.

"Babe!" Kelsie rolled her eyes. "If I get smacked on her way to get to you, you're paying for it later."

"Only because you have the biggest house!" Wade added quickly. "Barring Dave's, but we knew Maddie would never go for it."

"Yeah, way too many breakables in my house." Maddie agreed with a sober nod.

"Kasey," Yuri seemed to appear in front of her glass of wine in hand. "Have a drink and relax. Everything's going to be fine, promise."

Kasey took the offered glass of wine and sighed. "Of course you'd say that. You're married to Jeff Hardy! Stuff breaking in your house is a normal occurrence."

"I'd be offended by that statement if it wasn't true." Jeff shrugged from his position beside Morrison. "What can I say? We have crazy parties in NC."

"Here, here!" His brother Matt nodded in agreement. "Ingrid's just as used to it too."

"That's because I keep all my valuables locked away in the attic far away from you guys." Ingrid pointed out with a laugh. "Kasey doesn't have this kind of problem regularly, she's allowed to freak a little bit."

"Just drink your wine and everything will be a-okay." Kylie assured her.

"Right." Kasey nodded taking a huge gulp of her drink.

"THAT'S IT! KNOW YOUR DAMN ROLE AND SHUT YOUR DAMN-"

"YOU WANT SOME, COME GET SOME!"

Kasey's eyes widened and in the span of fifteen seconds drained what was left in her glass. "Refill please!"

"PUT HIM IN THE MASTERLOCK BABY!" Amy's shout could be heard. "BEFORE HE BREAKS SOMETHING ELSE!"

"Now!" Kasey's voice took on a note of panic.

"Got it!" Morrison took the glass from her and passed her an entire bottle. "Go for it, you'll thank me later."

"Seriously JoMo?"

"Just drink it, Kase," Victoria nodded. "Or you'll stress yourself into a coma or something."

"And people wonder why I am unsocial." Cody muttered to Kylie. "Because I don't want this kind of stuff ever happening to me."

"It's getting worse out there." Katie said to Maddie. "We better go make sure our guys are actually breaking it up and not participating."

"Sad." Maddie agreed. "But so true. Let's go."

"THIS IS EPIC, YO!" Zack sounded exciting. "This is totally going on the next episode!"

"Zack, put your phone away!" Lillian admonished him. "This isn't funny!"

"Are you serious?" Zack replied. "This is awesome! Woo woo woo, you know it!"

"Look on the bright side," Ingrid reassured Kasey. "You put down that bottle of wine, you're not going to care what happens anymore."

"Forget the wine." Christian suggested, gently nudging Reese onto his chair and getting to his feet. "Shots! The woman needs shots! Midori, straight up. Goes down sweet and will hit you fast."

Kasey accepted the shot glass full of neon green liquor and glared at Christian over the glass. "I'm still blaming you for this."

"Whatever." Christian shook his head. "You'll forgive me eventually. You have to. Perks of being your boyfriend's best friend."

"Where is Adam, anyway?" Reese asked suddenly. "I haven't seen him all night."

Kasey tossed back her shot, then frowned in confusion. "Actually, now that you mention it, I haven't seen him either."

"He was watching the shot contest with the rest of us a minute ago." Jeff looked around in confusion.

"He must have booked it when he saw Kasey come in looking ready to die." Matt joked. "He knew he was in trouble."

"IF YOU GUYS DON'T CUT THE SHIT RIGHT NOW I'M GOING TO GIVE EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU A SPEAR!"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Uh?" Victoria blinked, beginning to smile. "Well, we know where he is now."

"He went into the living room." Ellie informed them. "So did Mike to help really break it up." She said referring to her husband Mike Mizanin.

"But Adam-"

"SHUT UP, JERICHO! We've heard enough out of you for one evening. And if you touch that Karaoke microphone again tonight, I'll let Punk kick your ass all over the backyard."

"YES!" Chantel cheered again.

"And Cena I swear to God, Wrestlemania is over. You lost, get over it! Quit trying to instigate another fight with the Rock or get a rematch on another damn PPV or something!"

"Sounds like Adam's pulling rank." Kylie chuckled, leaning against Cody happily. "Feel better yet, Kase?"

"Marginally."

"AND PUNK? Diving at Jericho off my coffee table is NOT COOL! You're buying Kasey a new one!"

"Shit."

"So that's what the smash was." Matt chuckled. "We should have known," He said to Jeff. "We've broken a few in our day."

"And Masters-"

"Hey! I was trying to help!"

"BY PUTTING ORTON IN A FULL NELSON?"

"Seemed like a good idea at the time."

"HE'S OUT COLD AND HE'S NOT EVEN DRUNK!"

"I laughed."

"SHUT UP DAVE!"

SMACK! "Ow! Maddie!"

"That's what you get for being an Ass."

"Can I hit Masters, just once in retribution?"

"No Katie."

"Damn. You are so on my shit list Chris."

"It's Christmas time, you fools!" Adam continued. "Kasey and I threw this party so you guys could have fun and we could celebrate the Holiday! Not so you all could start a brawl in my living room!"

A chorus of sorrys answered the Rated R Superstar.

"Now," Adam sighed. "Mike, serenade your wife or something on Karaoke and let's get back to the actually party portion of the evening."

"YES!" Ellie cheered, running into the living room at Adam's suggestion.

Moments later, Mike's singing filled the house and the party resumed.

Adam strolled back into the kitchen, looking quite proud of himself and Kasey remembered why she had agreed to host the party in the first place, because if anyone could keep the WWE Superstars in line, it was Edge.

She slipped her arms around his waist when he joined her and sighed. "I take it that's the last of tonight's drama?"

"It's a WWE party, baby." Adam chuckled. "We knew a fight would break out at some point."

"True." She agreed. "I'm just glad you broke it up before the neighbors called the cops."

"I'm awesome like that."

"Hey?" A voice that sounded suspiciously like Cena's suddenly spoke up. "Is anyone going to revive Orton?"

* * *

**TOTAL CHRISTMAS CRACK FIC! LOL! HOPE YOU GUYS AND ENJOYED IT AND HAD A CHUCKLE OR TWO!**


End file.
